I don’t know how to write this post. How do you sum up sorrow and heartache with just simple words on a blog? The internet, by it’s very nature, seems too frivolous and public an arena to write about the passing of my stepfather. I, honestly, don’t really want to write about this, putting it on my blog only makes his absence more real and permanent. The problem is that every time I’m on the computer, trying to get work done, all I can think about is what I should say to the world so that you can understand what a great man, Gilbert Hermosillo, was.

Gilbert came into our lives relatively late, my sisters and I were adults and had formed our life habits already. Gilbert had been a bachelor for the majority of his life and when he fell head over heels in love with my mother, I’m not sure he knew what he was in for.  Liberal/Conservative, Vegetarian/Meat Lover, Feminist/Traditional. People from two completely different worlds rarely merge so peacefully. He was patient and knew that in time we would realize that he didn’t just want to love and care for my mother. Gilbert wanted to love and care for us.

And so we became one big happy family. Eating BBQ in the backyard (He became a pro at grilled veggies), taking family vacations, all of us spending the night at their house (including the dogs). Life just couldn’t get any better…and then Jackson arrived. As much as he loved us, Gilbert loved his grandson 10 times more. They had a connection that transcended words. Even when he became a crazy mobile toddler, Jackson was always content to sit in his Grandpa’s lap snacking on Cheerios. They simply “got” each other and I count myself lucky to have seen such an amazing relationship.

And now he’s gone and my heart hurts for my sisters, my husband, my brothers, Jackson and for my Mom. My amazing mother who loved and cared for him through out his entire illness and now needs us to love and care for her. I would do anything to make this sorrow easier for her to bear and I only hope she knows it.

I don’t know if we see our loved ones in an afterlife or not but one thing I do know is that I’ll “see” Gilbert every time I snuggle with Jackson while eating Cheerios. I’ll see him when I daydream of Costa Rica, drink a rich cup of coffee or blow out a shared birthday candle. He’ll be there laughing and loving us. I’ll see him when I remind myself to be tolerant and accepting, kind and generous. He’ll never really be gone as long as I can see him and all the lessons he taught.

Thank you, Gilbert, for all the love and support you shared with your family. We will love and miss you always.